Sunday, July 25, 2010

Happiness

"I remember one morning getting up at dawn, there was such a sense of possibility. You know, that feeling? And I remember thinking to myself: So, this is the beginning of happiness. This is where it starts. And of course there will always be more. It never occurred to me it wasn't the beginning. It was happiness. It was the moment. Right then."-Clarissa from The Hours
I remember this quote a lot. I read this book when I was 23 and it really stuck with me. I always assumed "Happiness" was a thing you achieved. You get to it, and then you're there. You've achieved happiness. Whoohooo, yay! Check "happiness" of the "to-do" list!
Nope.
It comes and goes. Appears for minutes, sometimes for long stretches, then disappears again until you least expect it.
I remember having this epiphany and being incredibly depressed. Then, later, realizing... well... if you "achieve" happiness, then what? Here goes another quote: "Ah, if life were made of moments... even now and then a bad one. But if life were only moments, then you'd never know you had one."- Baker's Wife from Into the Woods
So. I am thinking about this today because I am now skeptical when I feel incredibly happy. Perhaps waiting for the other shoe to drop, or perhaps listing reasons not be too excited... whatever. Shame on me. Happiness comes in moments, and I should bask in them for that moment, even if the other shoe is plummeting down, about to knock me in the head, why not embrace the joy before it clocks me? Why not be happy today, even if I have to admit I was foolish for embracing it tomorrow. Afterall, as my favorite Emerson quote reads: "Speak what you think today in hard words and tomorrow speak what tomorrow thinks in hard words again, though it contradict everything you said today."

1 comment:

  1. Good one, ILYM! I love the quotes, especially the bold Emerson quote of thinking and saying your truth right now without concern for the future (which doesn't exist anyway, right?). I feel ashamed and relieved at the same time, whenever one of my daughters - just by being herself - reminds me of the potentially awesome beauty of this very moment :-)

    ReplyDelete